Kelly Rued, Etcetera
Insufferable as NASCAR, indomitable as moon prospectors, metal as the wind—such is our love.
Welcome, svelte cybernauts, to my personal scrapblog. Some people say, "you waste so much time looking at stupid shit on the internet. When you're on your death bed, think how you'll wish you could get that time back." People who win at the internet don't go out like that. We'll have a lifetime of stupid internet shit saved in our scrapblogs so we can cherish it ON our death beds. Remember that great lol you had in June 1998? I don't either. Don't let your lolz continue to deteriorate like your aging, senile brain. Get a tumblelog and win at the internet. - PSA by KRetc.
This song is a staple on the classic rock station my mom liked. I only remembered the part that goes “street lights, people, o-oh-ohhhh” and I frequently get that line and only that line stuck in my head. Recently we saw a Family Guy where they sing this song at karaoke and I heard the chorus and realized I did know the rest of the song all along but in my mind they were two totally unrelated songs.
My theory is that childhood trauma created a deep fault line in long term memory where terrible things like Journey songs are suppressed and fractured as needed to maintain my tenuous grip on reality. This is related to my inability to discern Phil Collins from Genesis from Cat Stevens from Kyle Gass. Vocally I mean, one clearly has more hair.
You know you like Journey.
If I had a meth lab, that is what I’d put on the door to deter all unexpected visitors.
(via)
That is so racist. Why does he have to riding a blonde white unicorn?
President Obama on a unicorn…click picture for more.
Hit it Like This T-Shirt | Shirts Taste Good
The Slap Chop rap shirt stole my heart, then diced it with a pickle, hard boiled egg, and tuna.
Spock is Sexy, but…
I hesitated before reblogging this because as funny as it was to me, I didn’t want to give my boyfriend any ideas. When I had a crush on Captain Jack from the pirate flicks, he surprised me (and my kid who answered the door) by dressing up with a real captain-morgan-rum beard and everything. Which was cool. But I don’t know if that blue star fleet unitard would really do it for me in person. ;p
Today, my boyfriend told me that we would be living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up, ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML
Everything in this strip reads like ass.
The facial expressions and hand poses are like a 6 year old traced Garfield (poorly). Why do so many webcomic artists just mime the styles of famous cartoonists? I can’t even count how many webcomics recycle the facial expressions and gestures from Calvin and Hobbes or Penny Arcade. And the stick figure comics? It’s been done to death and really doesn’t work unless the writing is fanfuckingtastic. Or if you’re Sam Brown.
And the writing? Is that supposed to be funny or insightful or what? The Family Circus cartoon where the kid says “psghetti” is a jizzbomb of lolz compared to this.
Some Guy With a Website.
#5 cracked me up.
I think the best possible cosplay wedding involves everyone dressing up as pokemon simply so the vows can be changed to “so-and-so, I CHOOSE YOU!” And it’s not like it would be hard to make a VFW resemble a pokemon training gym.
(via infinitebutterflies)
Lol, nooooo. I want a crushing, staggeringly beautiful proposal. This funny shit would piss me off so much.
AHAHAHA.
this dude danced around in his underwear for 5 minutes to propose to his girlfriend. thank god she said yes.
Anal Penetrating Chair Kills Teen
Great, now I’m afraid of my chair. Don’t most ergonomic chairs have gas-cylinder-based seat adjustment?
This is just one more reason they should make lazy-boy reclining chairs at computer desk height. Like with a classy little step stool to hop on up there.
